Writer's Blog

Enochlophobia (fear of crowds)?

I haven’t posted for some time but I am back! You know how sometimes life takes over and then you get all out of rhythm, with seemingly no way back in? Well, yes or no, that’s kind of been me for the past few months.

My new line manager at work thought it would be a good idea if I took a course. I think she was trying to steer me towards a better future rather than telling me my management skills were severely lacking, but she suggested I did a Level 5 Diploma in Leadership and Management. Granted, she started her adult education route on the same course but there is still a nagging doubt that she questions my abilities. Enough of the self-doubt, I have sometimes motored and sometimes meandered through the various assignments and all have now been submitted. I have had a couple if referrals back and a couple of passes so there is still a way to go, but I am on the home straight. One thing is certain, I feel too old for it!

Now, how have you all been coping with the crisis? The buzzwords ‘Coronavirus’, and ‘Covid-19’, along with ‘social distancing’ and ‘furlough’ are at the forefront of the majority. All words and phrases which we had either never heard of, or put into context in quite the way they have been used in recent months.

If nothing else, we all now have a shared conversational subject. A shared understanding, on some level, of the pain and suffering of our fellow man.

Which leads me onto today’s question. How do you all feel about crowded places, right now? Do you sidestep into busy traffic to avoid oncoming pedestrians who are seemingly intent on breaking through the suggested 1- or 2- metre barrier you have invisibly formed around yourself?

I, for one, get nervous when I see groups of more than a handful of people together. I quietly tut and shake my head in the assumption that they are breaking all the social distancing rules. I roll my eyes at their close proximity to one another, certain they are not a part of a wider social bubble, knowing that, even if they are, they should still be practising safe distancing. I have become judge and jury over what constitutes one hundred or two hundred centimetres.

I am wide-eyed with disbelief when I hear tales of families getting together, knowing their kids are all a hair’s breadth away from the next child’s head – and don’t get me started on headlice! That’s a whole other story!

Working in a school, I can’t quite believe that we will soon be subjected to the masses returning. I fully understand that they need to return. The children need each other and they need to learn. I fear their complacence. While much emphasis is being put on pupil and teacher safety, I wonder if anyone considers those of us who support them all? Those who may not be considered at risk but who have worked throughout lockdown, keeping systems running smoothly, feeling safe and secure in our little bubbles of office spaces, safe in the knowledge that those spaces will not be encroached upon, thus widening the risks. I hope they have thought of us.

Let me know how you are feeling? Do you feel safe? Scared? Complacent? Unconcerned?

As I said, I have been otherwise engaged for a while but I am back.

Please, if you can, share my blog as I will be updating it with my musings…but you might be surprised to learn there will be no dancing tales for a while yet.

Its good to be back!


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